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Dewiring Process

by Mother Goose

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1.
The List 13:07
I had a list A list of things to do Every day, I'd check things off the list And every day, I'd add things to the list Only until it's complete Can my mind just breath and be Only until it's complete Can my life truly begin Hardly time for the future Not the past Or the present... On my list there was an ecstasy Written into every word Little bits of graphite lead the way Shackles and chains born of my own pen Written all over the ceiling (First thing that I see) Written all over the walls (Scratches in plaster) Written all over the windows (Cannot see outside) Written all over the mirror (Cannot see myself) Can't stop til its checked off the list... Erase the list On my list lay sinister apathy Checked off Every day of my life Waiting until nothing came my way My life became just a task to complete Hold off the urge to self-medicate There's no need to be afraid Don't let go but Don't list everything, bud I must relearn to live my life without restraint Hard to picture a world without these guidelines I've made So much to do - already so little daylight remains Exactly why I must begin to improvise Within chaos, I must begin to crystallize Within rigid, rules I must deharmonize To make this change, I cannot compromise It has taken much time, for me to realize That this is the only way I can self-humanize Erase the list Can't stop until it is erased Undertaking the self-imposed oaths of tomorrow Medicating parts of me that want life of rigid Boundaries and foundries of these mental shackles Watch As They Burn On my list, a frozen ecstasy Fan the pages in the crimson heat Lead is poison to the human mind Open the window and look outside Checked off the list... Erase the list...
2.
Darkness Stirring Cold sweat Evening of distortion Twilight of repulsion Night of disproportion So much going on I can't tell whats real Divide between myself And the other shapes around me Melting into the moonlight Where the primal fear lives Standing in the wings Waiting for a shot to the head (Executive functions lost) Body (Vanished into time and space) Eyes (Seeing the corporeal realm) Heart (As if a dream) (Within a bright) Darkness (Synapses are) Stirring (Writhing in a) Cold Sweat (Evening of) Distortion (Inside my head) Darkness (Looking around) Stirring (Covered in my) Cold Sweat (Heart beat of) Distortion So much going on I can't tell whats real So much... Going on... Too much... Cannot sleep... Sense of scale is brought into heightened hyper-focus Along with it, a grasp of my own mortality I am but a twig amongst moons and the starts, and The point of anything seems to high for me to reach towards (Within a bright) Darkness (Synapses are) Stirring (Writhing in a) Cold Sweat (Evening of) Distortion (Inside my head) Darkness (Looking around) Stirring (Covered in my) Cold Sweat Heart beat of... Distortion Repulsion Proportion Intortion Distortion (Of the young night) Distortion, repulsion (Of certainty) Proportions (Bending within) Distortions arranging Repulsions against these Proportions I'm seeing Intortional horrors Rabbit hole of deconstruction Night terror strikes Nothing is real
3.
Redefine and redefine Everything in your wacked out dog gooch sniffin Life for you must be the worst Take take, but what goes around comes around Fucking hippies Within this jigsaw Your pieces will not fit Among the others Passive aggressive blogging doesn't help Crypto Klepto (Decrypt the secrets of your lies) (Motives are not hard to find) (Reveal the depth of your decline) (Reveal how you lost your mind) With vitriol you judge and you blame A self-obsessed control freak with nothing to tame There is no solace to be found in your digital life No wonder you act like a dog gooch when face to face Close your mind's eye Keep the heat in The raw vegan Is a heathen Delusions... Illusions... Apocalyptic visions of human kind So full of So full of your own self Don't you know that you are a human being too No wonder you act like a pooch gooch So full of So full of your own self Don't you know that you are a human being too No wonder you act like a douche bag Apocalyptic visions are your one life's blood Delusions and illusions makes for a fun day at the glue factory Games will melt your brain... But this shit will get you REALLY fucked up Just look at these fuckin gooch sniffers Redefining and redefining Decrypting all your nothings Uncompressing your reflection So full of yourself You must be content with The destruction of your noggin For the sake of your cats And your dogs And your cars
4.
5.
One more... One last time... Indulge... In this redundant mind No more Refry Finished with repeating Everything Every single thing So much time Without impulsiveness Do or die: Mantra of both sides Productivity and captivity Oppositional minds to inhabit You'll find there's only Computational lies on one end Confrontational lives to pretend Until the falling times Only one way to live, so Until the wasting time, Do not take this for granted... [Now] (Darkness falls) Thoughts returning [Guard] (Hold them off) They will not take [Me] (From this field) Of existence Urge to check To know To breath To feel Now it's time for the attack of repetition Now it's time for the collapse and the fall Now it's time for the relapse I can't stay away Back to my old self It's been awhile Thought could run and hide But can't out last my own mind Now my arms are sore my legs are weak Guess that's what I get for thinking I could Resist the urge to return the stone to the cenobite realm Back to my old self It's been awhile Thought could run and hide But can't out last your own mind Now my arms are sore my legs are weak Guess that's what I get for thinking that I could Throw the stone One last time Hope Pray It won't return This redundancy
6.
Lake of Doom 02:55
7.
Pedagogical Fictitious constraint Mythological Cognitive restraint Empty out the soul Walmart brand rainbow Snuff out the last of Creativity Tonal focus blindsides all else We must get past the old ways Deaf indiscretion among the undead Hopeless progression from church to your head Your universalist device is fucked In tune with one way and out with the rest Go Go with the flow Just Make what you make Noise Can't be forgone For Sake of control There's no inherent right or wrong No innate right or wrong Constructed preferences invade your mind Tear down defenses and reverse the blind Deaf indiscretion among the undead In tune with one way and out with the rest Go Go with the flow Just Make what you make We Cannot forgo Noise For these undead Assholes... Tonally gentrified Cultural monody Only in darkness Only in silence Will we find answers To our own conscience Limit the question To just one method Unravel secrets of possibility Hold onto what sounds bimf to you Profane acts don't exist In a world of only sacredity No harm no foul In this world of zeal Feel the energy Just make what you make

about

this is what two years of only drinking waffle house chocolate milk and smoking cigars all day will result in.

that result being mother goose's debut LP; the first "proper album" i've made for the project. "proper" might not be the best way to describe any of the music on this thing, but i would consider it a cohesive record, if that's really what makes a collection of songs into an album. while there's definitely some sort of arc in each of the previously released mother goose EPs/comps, this record feels way more fleshed out in terms of the flow and scale of everything. there's some actual conceptual themes and shit on this one, guys. i would not call this a "concept album" per se, but many of the lyrics throughout the record are about trying to let go of control and training your mind to allow that to happen, which is kind of ironic considering that the music here is pretty rigidly composed. i thought about the discrepancy between what the lyrics were saying and what the music was doing while recording vocals for the album, probably because i was getting more into improvised music around that time. in a way, the lyrics are about where i want to take my music with mother goose after this record.

another big thing that sets this album apart from the rest of the discography is how it sounds. i think this is pretty definitively the best sounding mother goose release so far, and a lot (if not all) of that has to do with mike poole. mike helped me mix this thing and brought everything up to a level of quality that i had always dreamed about achieving for a project such as this one that was recorded primarily in bedrooms. in the 90s, mike worked with one of my favorite nashville bands ever, clockhammer. if you've never heard of clockhammer and you're into my music (first of all, thanks. second of all, you're weird. third of all...) you should give them a listen. he's also continued to work with some very interesting people throughout the years; a whole lot of them are listed on this website - www.mikepoolerecording.com . it was very cool to work with mike and imagine myself - whether true or not - in the lineage of very cool people he's worked with over the years. it's insane to think about how jank the recording process for this thing was and how good it ended up sounding due to mike's guidance. i've learned so much from him and i could gush about him forever. dude is so great at what he does and is also a super chill guy. SHOUT OUT MIKE POOLE!!!!

a funny thing about taking two years to put together an album is that by the time you're finished with it, your music taste has transformed into something totally different from what it was when you were writing the music. maybe that's not a universal experience, but it rings true to myself (and i heard björk talking about that in an interview one time). while i'm really happy with how this album turned out, i'm already rearin' to get going on the next one, which could end up very different from these songs. when i was writing the album, i was more into "epic" song structures - slow builds and whatnot. these days i tend towards more extreme, abstract, and generally unhinged music which isn't fully absent from this album, but i want to explore these aspects of music in more depth in future releases. i don't want to put my music in a box tho, so we'll see how things materialize.

anyways, that was a whole blurb. congrats for reading all of those words up there. unfortunately there is no reward for doing that. im gonna go to waffle house and try and smoke a cigar inside again. they've gotta let me do it one of these days.

credits

released September 22, 2023

Music and Lyrics: Chedda Cheeze
Guitars: Chedda Cheeze
Bass: Chedda Cheeze
Vocals: Chedda Cheeze
MIDI Programming: Chedda Cheeze
Violin on tracks 1&4: Lila Carleton
Drums: Chedda Cheeze
Noise: Chedda Cheeze

Narration on track 6: Gregg Margarite's reading of Philip K. Dick's "Piper in the Woods" (courtesy of LibriVox.org )

Recorded by: Chedda Cheeze
Mixing: Mike Poole & Cheeda Cheeze
Mastering: Mike Poole

Cover Artwork: Lila Carleton
Cover Design: Lila Carleton & Chedda Cheeze


Special thanks to:

Elias Sisneros for allowing me to use your mixer for no input purposes

Sasha Zubieta for letting me record with your violin bow

Morgan Luker, Bora Yoon (borayoon.com), Mark Burford, Shohei Kobayashi, Jim Kahan, Kirsten Volness (kirstenvolness.com) & Nicholas Emerson for encouraging and allowing me to take this music farther than I thought was possible in addition helping me become a more thoughtful and humble person

The Reed College Performing Arts Resource Center for providing me with both a space to record, as well as gear with which to undertake said recording

More thanks to the following companies responsible for hard/software that was used to create this album, Schecter Guitar Research, R. W. Jameson Guitar Company, Ernie Ball Incorporated, Floyd Rose, BOSS Pedals, Behringer, Slingerland Drum Company, Sabian Cymbals, Remo Incorporated, Vic Firth Company, Apple Inc., Logic Pro, Pro Tools, Avid Technology, Soundtoys, Aberrant DSP, Waves Audio Ltd., M-Audio, Focusrite PLC, Presonus Audio Electronics, Inc., Beyerdynamic GmbH & Co. KG, Shure Incorportated, and AKG Acoustics

Extra super duper duper special thanks to all of my friends and family members who have in each in some way or another helped to make me the person I am today and by extension this record. this is your fault too!!!

Also thanks to marijuana assisting in some of the creative processes, especially lyrical ones

Paradigm Shift Records 021

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Mother Goose

Mother Goose is the immaculately conceived brainchild of Chedda Cheeze.

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